Closing the Deficit ...

“It is very difficult to over-encourage someone.”  Mark Greenawald, MD (a principle I live by)

How do you like to be encouraged?  This is a question I ask frequently when I facilitate leadership development workshops, followed by a second question:  How many of you regularly feel like you are “over-encouraged”?  The various “don’t be ridiculous” looks I consistently receive after asking that second question, followed by uncomfortable laughter, confirms that most of us live with a significant “encouragement deficit.”  Indeed, it is a rarity when someone indicates that they’ve EVER felt over-encouraged. 

The word “encourage” is a fascinating word, originating from the Lain “cor” (heart) and prefix “en” (to cause to be in).  To cause to be in heart.  To help another person live with audacity, bravery, daring, fortitude, grit, tenacity, adventurousness, and wholeheartedness.  If we ever needed more of that in our lives, it is certainly during these times of COVID-19. 

What would it look like for others to help you live more from that space of “being encouraged”?  The first step in this process is to ask yourself, “How do I like to be encouraged?”  It may surprise you that we all hear encouragement in different ways.  The next step would be to invite others to offer encouragement to you in a way that will be most effective; “If you want to encourage me, here’s how best to do it” AND “This is where I presently could really use your encouragement.” 

Doing so places us in a space of vulnerability, but more importantly, in a place where we could close our encouragement deficit and, in the process, to live with “larger hearts.”  That sure sounds like a worthwhile risk to me – or perhaps just plain sanity ….