Elevating Your Kindness Quotient: Take the KQ Challenge

"Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom." — Theodore Isaac Rubin, MD, psychiatrist and author

The gesture was so simple.  It came by text from a colleague:  “Hey Mark, Thank you for these weekly PeerRx nudges and blogs.  They have helped my buddy and I stay connected for the past 4 years.  Just wanted to say thanks.”   That was it – 30 words that likely took less than 15 seconds to compose, and it tenderized my heart for the entire day.

In last week's blog, I shared a story of how a patient calling me “kind” had left me wondering, “What if kindness was one of the most immediately impactful therapies I could provide to those I care for?”  Yes kindness, the powerful force that not only uplifts others but also nourishes our own well-being.  I concluded my blog by encouraging our PeerRx community to take a "KQ Quiz" to gauge your baseline “Kindness Quotient” and promised this week to share some ideas as to how one can increase their KQ.  And now with that recent text, I’m now left wondering, “What if expressing kindness was one of the most important actions I could take every day, within or outside of my work?”

Self-kindness is really the foundation for raising your KQ.  It is crucial for your own well-being, and it is from a place of self-kindness that you will express it to others.  This includes self-forgiveness and compassionate self-talk.  It’s easy to be hard on yourself, especially when things don’t go as planned.  But consciously prioritizing and practicing self-kindness will allow you to experience a shift in to a “kindness mindset” over time.   

Once you have established a foundation of self-kindness, other kindness practices flow more naturally.  Giving someone your undivided attention through active listening with the intention of seeking to understand them is sadly, a too rare gift.  Offering a kind word, genuine compliment, or expression of gratitude can quickly lift someone’s spirit.  Performing intentional acts of kindness can be an instant “joy-spreader”, often inspiring others to pay it forward.  Being patient and forgiving when tempted to do otherwise can create a ripple effect of grace and harmony.  Making time for another, even briefly, can be one of the kindest things you can do. It might mean making a phone call to check in on someone, offering to help with a task, or simply sitting with them. 

So as you can see, increasing our KQ doesn’t require sweeping changes or elaborate plans.  It starts with small, intentional actions that when repeated daily, can lead to a profound shift in how we experience the world and how others experience us.  As the ancient Greek storyteller Aesop reminds us, "No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted."  So consider accepting my 21-day “Kindness Challenge” by choosing to perform at least one intentional act of kindness every day for the next 3 weeks and noticing the impact on you and others.  Then share what you experience with your PeerRx partner or another colleague.  In doing so, you may find that kindness starts to become not just something you do, but who you are.  And that might just change your life – for the even better.   

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Sowing Kindness by Showing Kindness

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Leaving Them Better Than You Found Them – Just Be Kind