You’ll Never OutSMART the Heart of an Elephant
“The heart of change is in the emotions.” John Kotter, DBA, author
In last week’s blog, we continued the journey of trying to understand why it is often so difficult to travel “the longest yard” – the distance between our knowledge (head), our beliefs (heart) and our action (hands) – when it comes to behavior change, and agreed that just because we “should” or even “need” to do something doesn’t mean this automatically translates into action.
But why? We’re rational creatures, right? It just can’t be that hard to start something that may be helpful or stop something that may be harmful, whether (in my case) it be saying no to a cookie or a keynote. Well, it turns out that “Just Do It” may be a good slogan for selling sneakers, but when it comes to changing our behavior, something larger seems to be at play. That “something” appears to have the power of an elephant when it comes to influencing whether or not we change.
In his 2006 book The Happiness Hypothesis, psychologist Jonathan Haidt proposed that when it comes to behavior change, we have 2 competing forces vying for control; one he called the “rider” (rational/analytical) and the other the “elephant” (emotional). In this analogy, the rider sees and directs the journey, and the elephant provides the power. Chip and Dan Heath extended this analogy in their 2010 book Switch: How to Change Things When Change is Hard by emphasizing that while the rider might appear to be in control, ultimately, it is the elephant who really is. So, as they travel down the path together (behavior change gap), when there is a disagreement, the elephant will invariably win.
These authors emphasize something that is often forgotten or underemphasized when it comes to behavior change – the role of emotion (what I call “heart”). This absence is demonstrated in the widely utilized SMART Goal Setting acronym (specific / measurable / achievable / relevant / time-bound), which is incomplete in that it gives the impression that the “rider” is not only in control, but that the “elephant” is simply “along for the ride”
But the elephant is not that easily ignored. It is no mistake that the word emotion derives from the Latin derivation of the word movere (move, stir, provoke) combined with the prefix “e” (out). Ultimately, despite our best thought-out plans, it is emotion that will move us out of our present state and catalyze behavior change (or not). The things that engender positive emotions in us tend to be things that we find inspiring or energizing and can often be powerful motivators for us to change. An example in my own life was my recovery from a severe back injury in 2019 and the vision of my being able to stand-up paddleboard again that ignited my determination through months of pain and grueling physical therapy. Recognizing that it’s often easier to build upon something than reinvent it, I have taken to encourage the setting of “I’M SMARTER” goals in my coaching and leader development work, with the SMART rider sandwiched between the “elephant attributes” of Inspiring and Motivating on one end and Energizing and Rewarding on the other. I’d be glad to share more details with any who are interested.
How about you? Where is your “elephant heart” undermining your plans for behavior change? Perhaps it’s time to get your rational plans and emotional drivers aligned by considering not just your "what" but your "why," and really start moving down your desired path. Well, not so fast. It turns out that even that alignment is not sufficient to most effectively travel the final “two feet” of the longest yard (“heart to hands”). Next week we’ll explore how collaboration between you and your PeerRxMed partner and others can help you progress along that journey by significantly closing that final gap. In the meantime, keep “feeding” your elephant large quantities of vision and inspiration in order to prepare for the upcoming journey of change.